the not knowing

guest poem by Rosemary Nowicki with art by Larry Green

The Double, by Larry Green

My guest is Rosemary Nowicki, a poet who lives in Steveston, British Columbia. She started writing about fifteen years ago when a lifelong love of words finally overtook her reluctance to put pen to paper. I met Rosemary when we were asked by the arts group, Pandora’s Collective, to collaborate by ‘pairing’ our writing in an event called ‘Poetic Pairings’. It was a very enjoyable and inspiring collaboration. Since then, Rosemary has been working hard on her craft and has recently published her first collection, intriguingly titled, This Is When I Am (Page & Nettle Press). Like me, Rosemary will often turn to art for inspiration, and the above work, The Double, by B.C. artist, Larry Green (bio below), which was exhibited at Vancouver’s Sidney and Gertrude Zack Gallery, occasioned for her a reflection and the resulting poem below. Enjoy.

The Double

Ah, there you are:

The you I want you to be, 
that I am sure you are.

Oh, and there is the you who is continually emerging. 

That you stares back at me, 
daring me to make another assumption:
go ahead, guess again. 

Like when you said you believe in God, 
and I was so stunned
I almost ran away. 
How could I not know? 

Sometimes I am exhausted by the not knowing,
especially when I was certain I did. 
And sometimes I am afraid of not knowing...

But then I reconsider: 
maybe not being entirely sure can be exhilarating. 
Maybe not knowing
is why we still have things to say to each other. 

Because we do not know,
and we may never be sure. 

Maybe. 

Larry Green is a British Columbia artist who started working in clay, one of his aims being to work through an experience of the self as “not some solid thing but rather a transient, ever changing process.” Today, Larry’s medium is photography and digital image editing that often aims to disturb what is taken-for-granted in order to allow the soul to rise to the surface. You can find more of his work at his website, here.